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Elegance is not a dispensable luxury but a factor that decides between success and failure.
There is only one nature - the division into science and engineering is a human imposition, not a natural one. Indeed, the division is a human failure; it reflects our limited capacity to comprehend the whole.
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If you were plowing a field, which would you rather use? Two strong oxen or 1024 chickens?
You ask me if I keep a notebook to record my great ideas. I\'ve only ever had one.
Pardon him, Theodotus; he is a barbarian, and thinks that the customs of his tribe and island are the laws of nature.
The cynics are right nine times out of ten.
Where are we going, and why am I in this handbasket?
It was God who made me so beautiful. If I weren\'t, then I\'d be a teacher.
Wise men make proverbs, but fools repeat them.
Cholesterol is your natural defence against excessive circulation of blood, which can carry venoms, poisons and other toxins around your body.
Everything has been figured out, except how to live.
Sex is like a Chinese dinner. It isn\'t over until everyone gets their cookies.
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Puritanism: The haunting fear that someone, somewhere, may be happy.
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A model is done when nothing else can be taken out.
Everything that can be invented has been invented.
All are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusion is called a philosopher.
A mathematician is a device for turning coffee into theorems.
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I have yet to meet a C compiler that is more friendly and easier to use than eating soup with a knife.
I don\'t know anything about music. In my line you don\'t have to.
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Of all the enemies to public liberty, war is perhaps the most to be dreaded because it comprises and develops the germ of every other.
We will not learn how to live together in peace by killing each other\'s children.
I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam; I looked into the soul of the boy next to me.
Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It\'s the transition that\'s troublesome.
So I was in my car, and I was driving along, and my boss rang up and he said \'You\'ve been promoted\'. And I swerved. And then he rang up a second time and said \'You\'ve been promoted again\'. And I swerved again. He rang up a third time and said \'You\'re managing director.\' And I went into a tree. And a policeman came up and said \'What happened to you?\' And I Said \'I careered off the road.\'
Tact is the ability to tell a man he has an open mind when he has a hole in his head.
Egotist: a person more interested in himself than in me.
Too many pieces of music finish too long after the end.
You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.
The true measure of a man is how he treats someone who can do him absolutely no good.
Is it not a strange blindness on our part to teach publicly the techniques of warfare and to reward with medals those who prove to be the most adroit killers?
Did you ever walk in a room and forget why you walked in? I think that\'s how dogs spend their lives.
A poem is never finished, only abandoned.
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Gentleman: Knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn\'t.
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The years of peak mental activity are undoubtedly between the ages of four and eighteen. At four we know all the questions, at eighteen all the answers.
Research is what I\'m doing when I don\'t know what I\'m doing.
C makes it easy to shoot yourself in the foot; C++ makes it harder, but when you do, it blows away your whole leg.
Minsky\'s Second Law: Don\'t just do something. Stand there.
Death is a low chemical trick played on everybody except sequoia trees.
Life would be so much easier if we could just see the source code.
The surest way to corrupt a youth is to instruct him to hold in higher esteem those who think alike than those who think differently
A [pseudo]random number generator is much like sex: when it\'s good it\'s wonderful, and when it\'s bad it\'s still pretty good.
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We don\'t like their sound, and guitar music is on the way out.
War doesn\'t make boys men, it makes men dead.
A camel is a horse designed by a committee
I\'m not going to get into the ring with Tolstoy.
And the clueless shall spend their time reinventing the wheel while the elite merely use the Wordstar key mappings
If people are good only because they fear punishment, and hope for reward, then we are a sorry lot indeed.
Our government has kept us in a perpetual state of fear - kept us in a continuous stampede of patriotic fervor - with the cry of grave national emergency.
Egotist: a person more interested in himself than in me.
Don\'t let it end like this. Tell them I said something.
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The object of war is not to die for your country but to make the other bastard die for his.
Mr. Wagner has beautiful moments but bad quarters of an hour.
It is better to be feared than loved, if you cannot be both.
Nine out of ten doctors agree that one out of ten doctors is an idiot.
The artist is nothing without the gift, but the gift is nothing without work.
Puritanism: The haunting fear that someone, somewhere, may be happy.
A bird in the hand makes it hard to blow your nose.
That is the saving grace of humor, if you fail no one is laughing at you.
If people can judge me on the company I keep, they would judge me with keeping really good company with Laura.
The competent programmer is fully aware of the limited size of his own skull. He therefore approaches his task with full humility, and avoids clever tricks like the plague.
I am an expert of electricity. My father occupied the chair of applied electricity at the state prison.
Talent does what it can; genius does what it must.
Ah well, then I suppose I shall have to die beyond my means.
If it wasn\'t for lawyers, we wouldn\'t need them.
Every normal man must be tempted at times to spit upon his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin slitting throats.
Lohr\'s Law: The future is merely the past with a twist ? and better tools.
The only rules comedy can tolerate are those of taste, and the only limitations those of libel.
I am ready to meet my Maker. Whether my Maker is prepared for the great ordeal of meeting me is another matter.
The surest way to corrupt a youth is to instruct him to hold in higher esteem those who think alike than those who think differently
A good sermon should be like a woman\'s skirt: short enough to arouse interest but long enough to cover the essentials.
But at my back I always hear Time\'s winged chariot hurrying near.
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I\'m all in favor of keeping dangerous weapons out of the hands of fools. Let\'s start with typewriters.
So I was getting into my car, and this bloke says to me
Outside of a dog, a book is man\'s best friend. Inside of a dog, it\'s too dark to read.
Science is like sex: sometimes something useful comes out, but that is not the reason we are doing it
My last cow just died, so I won\'t need your bull anymore.
Man is the best computer we can put aboard a spacecraft... and the only one that can be mass produced with unskilled labor.
The graveyards are full of indispensable men.
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C combines all the power of assembly language with the ease of use of assembly language
Momma always said life was like a box of chocolates. You never know what you\'re gonna get.
Physics is not a religion. If it were, we\'d have a much easier time raising money.
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We need either less corruption or more chance to participate in it.
Marry me and I\'ll never look at another horse!
A bird in the hand makes it hard to blow your nose.
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Deliver yesterday, code today, think tomorrow.
Wise men make proverbs, but fools repeat them.
A sure cure for seasickness is to sit under a tree.
The difference between what the most and the least learned people know is inexpressibly trivial in relation to that which is unknown.
You can pretend to be serious; you can\'t pretend to be witty.
If there is no Hell, a good many preachers are obtaining money under false pretences.
The nice thing about egotists is that they don\'t talk about other people.
The study of non-linear physics is like the study of non-elephant biology.
Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain - and most fools do.
My neighbour asked if he could use my lawnmower and I told him of course he could, so long as he didn\'t take it out of my garden.
If computers get too powerful, we can organize them into a committee -- that will do them in.
Descended from the apes? Let us hope that it is not true. But if it is, let us pray that it may not become generally known.
What a cruel thing is war: to separate and destroy families and friends, and mar the purest joys and happiness God has granted us in this world; to fill our hearts with hatred instead of love for our neighbors, and to devastate the fair face of this beautiful world.
If you gaze long into an abyss, the abyss will gaze back into you.
I once heard two ladies going on and on about the pains of childbirth and how men don\'t seem to know what real pain is. I asked if either of them ever got themselves caught in a zipper.
Why don\'t they make the whole plane out of that black box stuff.
Patriotism means to stand by the country. It does not mean to stand by the president or any other public official...
Why don\'t you write books people can read?
I Can\'t Think Of Anything Reasonable To Counter Your Argument Or Don\'t Have The Least Inkling Of The Subject So I Will Resort To Name Calling And Hope I Can Get Away With It.
The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending, then having the two as close together as possible.
There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home.
Anything that is too stupid to be spoken is sung.
Physics is not a religion. If it were, we\'d have a much easier time raising money.
They say such nice things about people at their funerals that it makes me sad that I\'m going to miss mine by just a few days.
I heard someone tried the monkeys-on-typewriters bit trying for the plays of W. Shakespeare, but all they got was the collected works of Francis Bacon.
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Imitation is the sincerest form of television.
People who think they know everything greatly annoy those of us who do.
When the rich think about the poor, they have poor ideas.
Hearing nuns\' confessions is like being stoned to death with popcorn.
Richard Nixon is a no good, lying bastard. He can lie out of both sides of his mouth at the same time, and if he ever caught himself telling the truth, he\'d lie just to keep his hand in.
Don\'t sweat the petty things, just pet the sweaty things.
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That is the saving grace of humor, if you fail no one is laughing at you.
Just because bulldozers are used to build highways doesn\'t mean bulldozers are the best way to travel on a highway.
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First you forget names, then you forget faces. Next you forget to pull your zipper up and finally, you forget to pull it down.
An intellectual is someone who has found something more interesting than sex.
Believe those who are seeking the truth. Doubt those who find it.
Ketchup left overnight on dinner plates has a longer half-life than radioactive waste.
Of all the enemies to public liberty, war is perhaps the most to be dreaded because it comprises and develops the germ of every other.
The belief in the possibility of a short decisive war appears to be one of the most ancient and dangerous of human illusions.
When ideas fail, words come in very handy.
I\'d give my right arm to be ambidextrous.
In the begining there was nothing and God said \'Let there be light\', and there was still nothing but everybody could see it.
Minsky\'s Second Law: Don\'t just do something. Stand there.
If people are good only because they fear punishment, and hope for reward, then we are a sorry lot indeed.
If a man does his best, what else is there?
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Distrust any enterprise that requires new clothes.
Maybe there is no actual place called hell. Maybe hell is just having to listen to our grandparents breathe through their noses when they\'re eating sandwiches.
It\'s dangerous to underestimate the intelligence of a customer who grew a business that\'s successful enough to require a large and complex set of software
I have an existential map; it has \'you are here\' written all over it.
No one can earn a million dollars honestly.
Distrust any enterprise that requires new clothes.
All I need to make a comedy is a park, a policeman and a pretty girl.
After every \'victory\' you have more enemies.
Some men, in order to prevent the supposed intentions of their adversaries, have committed the most enormous cruelties.
Elegance is not a dispensable luxury but a factor that decides between success and failure.
Imagine if every Thursday your shoes exploded if you tied them the usual way. This happens to us all the time with computers, and nobody thinks of complaining.
Not everything that can be counted counts, and not everything that counts can be counted.
The de facto role of the US armed forces will be to keep the world safe for our economy and open to our cultural assault.
Happiness is good health and a bad memory.
The surest way to corrupt a youth is to instruct him to hold in higher esteem those who think alike than those who think differently
The role of the president of the United States is to support the decisions that are made by the people of Israel. It is not up to us to pick and choose from among the political parties.
Inanimate objects can be classified scientifically into three major categories; those that don\'t work, those that break down and those that get lost.
Black holes are where God divided by zero.
When you have to kill a man, it costs nothing to be polite.
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I took a course in speed reading and was able to read War and Peace in twenty minutes. It\'s about Russia.
My neighbour asked if he could use my lawnmower and I told him of course he could, so long as he didn\'t take it out of my garden.
Experience is what you get when you were expecting something else.
I have six locks on my door, all in a row. When I go out, I lock every other one. I figure no matter how long somebody stands there picking the locks, they are always locking three of them.
A camel is a horse designed by a committee
It\'s strange, isn\'t it. You stand in the middle of a library and go \'aaaaagghhhh\' and everyone just stares at you. But you do the same thing on an aeroplane, and everyone joins in.
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Total absence of humor renders life impossible.
Glory is fleeting, but obscurity is forever.
Our children are not born to hate, they are raised to hate.
The de facto role of the US armed forces will be to keep the world safe for our economy and open to our cultural assault.
The President has kept all of the promises he intended to keep.
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The de facto role of the US armed forces will be to keep the world safe for our economy and open to our cultural assault.
Many a man\'s reputation would not know his character if they met on the street.
A friendship founded on business is better than a business founded on friendship.
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I am ready to meet my Maker. Whether my Maker is prepared for the great ordeal of meeting me is another matter.
A mind all logic is like a knife all blade. It makes the hand bleed that uses it.
Sometimes when reading Goethe I have the paralyzing suspicion that he is trying to be funny.
Biologically speaking, if something bites you it\'s more likely to be female.
There are some experiences in life which should not be demanded twice from any man, and one of them is listening to the Brahms Requiem.
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How can I believe in God when just last week I got my tongue caught in the roller of an electric typewriter?
If you are going through hell, keep going.
Patriotism means to stand by the country. It does not mean to stand by the president or any other public official...
If you try and take a cat apart to see how it works, the first thing you have in your hands is a non-working cat.
A great many people think they are thinking when they are merely rearranging their prejudices.
Statistics is like a bikini. What they reveal is suggestive. What they conceal is vital.
Most people would sooner die than think; in fact, they do so.
Politicians are like diapers. They should be changed often, and for the same reason.
Make everything as simple as possible, but not simpler.
About the use of language: it is impossible to sharpen a pencil with a blunt axe. It is equally vain to try to do it with ten blunt axes instead.
If you were plowing a field, which would you rather use? Two strong oxen or 1024 chickens?
The best way to predict the future is to invent it.
Not everything that can be counted counts, and not everything that counts can be counted.
I was raised in the West. The west of Texas. It\'s pretty close to California. In more ways than Washington, D.C., is close to California.
Imitation is the sincerest form of television.
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Is it not a strange blindness on our part to teach publicly the techniques of warfare and to reward with medals those who prove to be the most adroit killers?
Sometimes a scream is better than a thesis.
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The fear of death is the most unjustified of all fears, for there\'s no risk of accident for someone who\'s dead.
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If there is no God, who pops up the next Kleenex?
Everybody\'s worried about stopping terrorism. Well, there\'s a really easy way: stop participating in it.
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If you can\'t get rid of the skeleton in your closet, you\'d best teach it to dance.
There is a charm about the forbidden that makes it unspeakably diserable.
In theory, there is no difference between theory and practice. But, in practice, there is.
A [pseudo]random number generator is much like sex: when it\'s good it\'s wonderful, and when it\'s bad it\'s still pretty good.
Marry me and I\'ll never look at another horse!
I was raised in the Jewish tradition, taught never to marry a Gentile woman, shave on a Saturday night and, most especially, never to shave a Gentile woman on a Saturday night.
We don\'t make mistakes, we just have happy little accidents.
If you\'re sick and tired of the politics of cynicism and polls and principles, come and join this campaign.
Egotist: a person more interested in himself than in me.
Behind every great fortune there is a crime.
Men are not disturbed by things, but the view they take of things.
I can write better than anybody who can write faster, and I can write faster than anybody who can write better.
I have an existential map; it has \'you are here\' written all over it.
Moral indignation is jealousy with a halo.
Imitation is the sincerest form of television.
To understand a man you should walk a mile in his shoes. If what he says still bothers you that\'s ok because you\'ll be a mile away from him and you\'ll have his shoes.
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The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending, then having the two as close together as possible.
The most important job is not to be Governor, or First Lady in my case.
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When his life was ruined, his family killed, his farm destroyed, Job knelt down on the ground and yelled up to the heavens, \'Why god? Why me?\' and the thundering voice of God answered, \'There\'s just something about you that pisses me off.\'
If you try and take a cat apart to see how it works, the first thing you have in your hands is a non-working cat.
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If you\'re sick and tired of the politics of cynicism and polls and principles, come and join this campaign.
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Just because bulldozers are used to build highways doesn\'t mean bulldozers are the best way to travel on a highway.
Sex is like a Chinese dinner. It isn\'t over until everyone gets their cookies.
Descended from the apes? Let us hope that it is not true. But if it is, let us pray that it may not become generally known.
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Not everything that can be counted counts, and not everything that counts can be counted.
Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one.
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University politics are vicious precisely because the stakes are so small.
Believe those who are seeking the truth. Doubt those who find it.
Ask people why they have deer heads on their walls and they tell you it\'s because they\'re such beautiful animals. I think my wife is beautiful, but I only have photographs of her on the wall.
Once you eliminate the impossible, whatever remains, no matter how improbable, must be the truth.
Everyone is a genius at least once a year; a real genius has his original ideas closer together.
Good people do not need laws to tell them to act responsibly, while bad people will find a way around the laws.
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Sometimes a scream is better than a thesis.
Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn\'t go away.
My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you\'ll be happy; if not, you\'ll become a philosopher.
A man can\'t be too careful in the choice of his enemies.
People demand freedom of speech to make up for the freedom of thought which they avoid.
We should leave our minds open, but not so open that our brains fall out.
They laughed when I said I\'d be a comedian. They aren\'t laughing now.
The only rules comedy can tolerate are those of taste, and the only limitations those of libel.
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In this world, nothing is certain but death and taxes.
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It\'s not the size of the dog in the fight, it\'s the size of the fight in the dog.
It\'s not that I\'m afraid to die, I just don\'t want to be there when it happens.
Look at you in war. There has never been a just one, never an honorable one, on the part of the instigator of the war.
The only rules comedy can tolerate are those of taste, and the only limitations those of libel.
Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife.
Object-oriented programming is a style of programming designed to teach students about stacks.
When you hear hoofbeats, think of horses, not zebras.
Don\'t let it end like this. Tell them I said something.
The role of the president of the United States is to support the decisions that are made by the people of Israel. It is not up to us to pick and choose from among the political parties.
最終更新日 : 2012/01/26/(Thu) 10:27
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